Saturday, April 4, 2009

Testing Time Again

It's right around the corner....Green Belt.

Things are so different now than when I first started TKD. I have discovered a competitive beast that lives somewhere deep inside. I wish I could channel this person more often. She only seems to come out during tournament and testing time.

A couple of weeks ago I competed in my second ever tournament. In the weeks leading up to it, I was very nervous. I felt so unprepared. Though I had good intentions I didn't train nearly as much I would have wanted to, but I'm just doing this for fun right??

I really surprised myself. Despite my lack of extra effort leading up to the tournament, I did REALLY well. I received first place in forms and third in sparring. The sparring was sooooo close. I fought someone who was two ranks above me. I was surprised by how unafraid I was. Had my conditioning been a little better, I could have taken her.

I looked across the ring at this person that I KNEW was more advanced and better skilled than myself, and I had absolutely no fear. The only thing going through my mind was the need to win. Even though I didn't, I proved so much to myself.

I DO have the drive, I DO have the confidence, I DO have the ability. Thirty seconds can mean EVERYTHING. It takes months to be ready for the last 30 seconds.

Watching J at black belt training makes me want more for myself. I know I can do this. It will take tons of hard work and dedication. Much more than the two days a week that's devoted to it now, but I have it in me.

First order of business is to lose some more weight and become better conditioned.

This week's goal....30 minutes of cardio every day.